December 2008
1 post
September 2008
3 posts
VODKA--why is that in caps?
I’m investing in a big bottle of vodka. I can’t drink that as fast as two bottles of wine. Of course, I’ll try, but I’ll be so fucked up I won’t do it again and the last half of the bottle will last longer.
Like my logic?
Changes bitches!!!
So my Twitter got invaded by worshop people a person. So I’m going to post all my drunken ramblings here. I’m also changing the name. Any suggestions?
Sorry, there was a typo and I dont want to be all Mary Rambin on you. At least no on my Tumblr.
I totally forgot I had this blog. I’ve been less bitchy lately.
August 2008
1 post
Yep, we've been drinking
Laura: ...and i wanted to be like um if you followed my direction your job wouldn't be hard
Khaliah: hmm...he's lazy...vibrators make everything so nice
Laura: yeah, i know!
i thought dudes were supposed to be open to vibrators
you know, eventually
me: Unless they're french....But its true vibrators come much later...unless he's french
April 2008
9 posts
Easy as 1-2-3.
It was another great Baugher post…but then when are they not great? I read this post and then found myself most concerned with the fact that ABC.com is covering this. Is news really that slow? Are gas prices not rising? Is there still a war in Iraq? Really ABCnews.com? Julia Allison? Really? This is why people no longer read/watch the news. baugher: I guess I have to parse the ABC.com...
Me: Did you ever hear from that dude?
Friend: Nah. I think I've gotten, like, 2 texts in the past year.
Me: Typical.
Friend: Yeah, I'm like, thanks for the sex, dude. Too bad I couldn't feel your penis.
me: i can't believe I'm yawning after lying down all day
Ayanna: lol
me: i'm surprised neither of us have bed sores
Ayanna: HAHA
LOL
OMG
i think i just peed a little from laughing so hard at the bed sores thing
me: HA!
ewww
Ayanna: brb - i need to use the bathroom now before i pee for real. i cant stop lauging. its making me cry its so funny
brb
me: ok
Ayanna: i decided to brush my teeth too
me: yay!!!
hygiene!!!
Ayanna: woohoo!
but i didnt wash my face
or shower
me: when I stop drinking soda i might do the same
i smell
Ayanna: sooo....i'm still kinda gorss
but i dont smell!
i did actually shower yesterday
me: I smell a little
Ayanna: lol
Last night
I was really bitchy about some of the people in my cohort at that super fancy school I go to. You know, the place where everyone is absolutely certain for their future successes and talents. I was terribly bitchy. And I meant every word of it too.
Winding down.
I think baugher is being utterly selfish. What will Julia and Mary do with the parsing? How will they know to be angry that someone is calling them out on their absurditiy? It is a sad day indeed. Although if you think about it, the parsing was the most interesting thing about either of these ladies in the last few months anyway. So perhaps now they will fade away…. baugher: Internet, our...
I do hate Florida. It’s too damn hot. They do have Disney though. And Epcott. I loved Epcott.
It just gets better - Khaliah, vino bottle #2
I get better and better
Khaliah: Can we share a hotel room [at the wedding in Cape Cod]?
Me: Yes, but if we want to get laid, we'll just have to agree that it's going to be group sex.
Khaliah: Sex with who?
Me: I dunno. Cater waiters. Townies.
Khaliah: The cater-waiters better be hot then cause if I don't sleep with Iowa townies . . .
Khaliah: What makes the cod . . .o wait. . .cod . . .never mind.
Me: Yes dear? What makes the Cod Cape?
Khaliah: o cod...cod piece....penis.
Khaliah: I have a one track mind.
Me: why is it called a cod piece? what are you trying to ask?
Khaliah: no I was trying to make a joke about sex the cape...cod.
“My [minimum wage job] won’t pay my rent… I’m gonna get an Iphone. You should get...”
– Khaliah, on why I need to get out of my cellphone contract and get an Iphone. (via thefamouschronicles) Yep. I’m reblogging my own quote.
February 2008
3 posts
“A writer never has a vacation. For a writer life consists of either writing or...”
– Eugene Ionesco
“There’s nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and...”
– Walter Wellesley “Red” Smith
Getting Personal
I write best when drunk. Now I don’t drink. Fuck.